Moore Weep Not: Overcoming Grief, Disappointment, and Loss

1. Auflage 2015
ISBN: 978-1-4835-5722-9
Verlag: BookBaby
Format: EPUB
Kopierschutz: Adobe DRM (»Systemvoraussetzungen)

E-Book, Englisch, 218 Seiten

Reihe: Weep Not: Overcoming Grief, Disappointment, and Loss

Your life is not over because your relationship is over. Loss is painful, but it doesn't have to destroy you. In Weep Not, Moore offers biblical hope, comfort, and practical steps to heal after the death of a loved one. Discover how to release guilt, reject despair, and embrace the comforting presence of the Holy Spirit so you can live again - fully and joyfully.

Mike Moore is on a mission to see believers become leaders in their homes, businesses, ministries, and communities. He focuses on this mission in three areas; (1) Teach and equip the Body of Christ, (2) Develop churches, and (3) Coach and mentor leaders. His vision is to equip believers with biblical truth for living a spiritually, physically, mentally, relationally, and financially thriving lifestyle. Mike Moore Ministries was built upon the simple yet profound truth that, 'The Word of God Is the Answer' for every situation. He is also the founding pastor of Faith Chapel in Birmingham, Alabama and Columbus, Georgia. He led Faith Chapel for over 40 years. In January 2023, he transitioned out of his role of Senior Pastor and his son, Michael K. Moore assumed the role of Lead Pastor. Mike Moore can be seen on his YouTube channel, How To Win podcast, Answers That Work with Mike Moore show, and at conferences. And he is the author of numerous impactful books including The God of Abundance, Help! My Mind Is Under Attack, and his newest release, The BIG Pivot. He is a graduate of Berea College where he met his best friend and the love of his life, Kennetha. They have two adult children, Pastor Michael K. Moore and Tiffany Moore, daughter-in-law Michelle, and three beautiful granddaughters.

Autoren/Hrsg.

Moore, Michael D.

Leseproben

CHAPTER 1

Understanding Mourning

T here is a difference between mourning and grieving. “Mourning”is the natural, emotional side of the issue. I often say that “mourning” is an emotional experience. On the other hand,“grief ” is the spiritual side of the issue. I like to say that grief is a spiritual experience.

When you are confronted with grief, you are not just dealing with emotions. You are dealing with the spiritual. That needs to be separated in your thinking. If you confuse the two, you will be waiting for your condition to change and it never will.

Let’s separate the two and distinguish between “mourning”and “grieving.”

Let’s look at Genesis 23:1-2:

Sarah lived one hundred and twenty-seven years; these were the years of the life of Sarah.

So Sarah died in Kirjath Arba; (that is, Hebron) in the land of Canaan, and Abraham came to mourn for Sarah and to weep for her.

Mourning is the natural process of natural emotions and feelings of sadness which are uniquely experienced after the loss of any significant relationship, possession, position, or ambition. I want you to see that mourning is a natural thing, and the sadness that accompanies mourning is a natural thing. It is a unique thing. In fact, it is so unique that we have to be careful when we tell others, “I know how you feel.” Maybe it would be better to say, “I am concerned about you and I love you,” because, in truth, no one can really know what you feel.

Usually mourning is accompanied by crying and crying is caused by the natural feelings of personal loss in the sense that the person known and loved will no longer be there for you to have personal, physical contact or fellowship with. The person you knew and loved — Mama, Daddy, a child, brother, sister, friend, or church member — will no longer share personal contact and fellowship in your life. This is why there is a sense of sadness, which is usually accompanied by tears.

The Bible says that Sarah died. Abraham loved Sarah, and he came to mourn and weep for her.

We all mourn the death of our loved ones. Mourning is not a sin. You are not out of the will of God when you mourn or cry.

John 11:32-35 says:

Then, when Mary came where Jesus was, and saw Him, she fell down at His feet, saying to Him,“Lord, if You had been here, my brother would not have died.”

Therefore, when Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who came with her weeping, He groaned in the spirit and was troubled.

And He said,“Where have you laid him?”They said to him,“Lord, come and see.”

Jesus wept.

Even Jesus, the Head of the Church, wept, so mourning is the normal process of natural emotions and feelings of sadness that are uniquely experienced after the loss of any significant relationship, possession, position, or ambition.

Mourning doesn’t have to involve a relationship. I was in law school, pursuing law in preparation to become an attorney. My esteem was deeply associated with becoming an attorney. One day, in between classes, I went out to my car to eat lunch. This was when God called me into the ministry. I mean, literally, I was called into the ministry between classes! He altered my direction. It certainly wasn’t what I had planned and wasn’t something I was looking forward to doing. But I followed the call of God on my life, quitting law school, and set out to pursue the ministry. That was a huge loss in my life because a certain ambition was unfulfilled in me. I struggled and mourned over it. I would go to sleep at night and dream about law school. It took me a good while to overcome that feeling of loss.

The loss that you are experiencing may not be the death of a loved one. It might be the death of an ambition, as in my situation, or any disappointment for that matter.

Crying is associated with mourning. It is healthy and it is scriptural. It is not a sign of a lack of faith.

Crying is associated with mourning. It is healthy and it is scriptural. It is not a sign of a lack of faith.

The Bible says we are to follow in the steps of our father, Abraham. The Bible calls Abraham the father of the faithful. We see in Scripture that Abraham mourned the death of his wife, Sarah. He wept for her.

I don’t know about you, but when members of my church die, I cry, but I have to get my crying over before I minister to the people. I have to pull myself together. I feel better after I cry. The Bible says Jesus wept. We know Jesus had faith, didn’t He? Yet the Bible says Jesus cried.

On the other hand, if you don’t feel like crying, don’t. If you don’t cry, it is not a sign that you don’t care or didn’t love the deceased.

I am dealing with two extremes. There are some Christians who are not going to cry because they have a perception that if a person has faith then they should not cry. That is not a sign of faith. You are robbing yourself of a very important emotional release you receive when you cry.

On the other hand, there are so many expectations that people have and maybe you honestly don’t feel like crying. Maybe the tears aren’t there and you don’t need to cry. What I am trying to say here is to be genuine. If you don’t need to cry, don’t worry. It is not a sign that you don’t love the deceased person if you don’t cry. It is not necessary that you meet the expectations of others. It is normal to mourn and natural to cry. We are all unique individuals and our experiences in the way we deal with grief are all very unique.

We are all unique individuals and our experiences in the way we deal with grief are all very unique.

Mourning Is a Process

For most people, mourning is a process. A series of thoughts, actions, and feelings that you experience at the death of a loved one or when you go through a divorce. Let’s say your pet dies. You have various feelings and emotions. Much of the time it is a process of adjustment.

Psalm 23:4 says, “Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death… .” Now, I am not going to camp or set up residence in the valley. I am walking through it. I want you to think about this valley as being the different emotions that we feel when we experience a loss.

Notice, I am walking through, but it is going to take me time to get through the valley, and that is alright. It is alright if it takes you a period of time to get through the valley, because mourning involves a process. When a significant loved one departs, you aren’t suddenly over that person. I don’t care how much faith you have. This is someone that you loved, someone who played a serious part in your life. Your life was tied into that person. There was a bond. You are not just going to get over it in a day. It is a process.

Experiences in the Mourning Process

“Yea, though I walk through the valley… .” The process may include any or all of the following 10 experiences:

1.    The adjustment may include shock, which is emotional numbness. You may be stunned and in disbelief. It doesn’t seem real.

When my daddy died, (my hero), it just didn’t seem real. I felt like, I am dreaming. I am going to go to sleep, then wake up and discover that this was just a bad dream.

2.    Part of the adjustment process may include weeping and crying. You may find yourself crying a lot, not crying initially then crying later on, or crying through the whole process.

3.    The adjustment process may include depression and loneliness, which often includes despair, self-pity, and isolation.

I have been married to my wife, Kennetha (Pete), for thirty years. What would it be like if suddenly I didn’t have her by my side? That would be a major adjustment for me.

There are times that you will feel especially lonely. There is nothing wrong with you. That is natural. It would be strange if you didn’t feel some sense of loneliness at times. Then sometimes you may want to feel sorry for yourself. That is a part of depression and loneliness.

4.    The adjustment may include feeling panicky or fearful. Your mind will be a flurry of thoughts: How am I going to make it? I have all this responsibility, so many things and I can hardly concentrate. Are you losing your mind? No, you are not losing your mind. You are just going through the valley.

5.    Some people experience physical pain and symptoms of illness. Grief and worry can have a devastating impact on the physical body.

6.    Other people deal with a great deal of guilt and regret. You have to resist the “could’ve, would’ve, and should’ve,” because you are going to feel that.

Growing up, my mother was my biggest fan. She would tell me when I was busy with the church, running here and there, “Mike, just call me.” She knew I loved her and I knew she loved me. She said,“You need to call me more.”

When she died, believe me, I was definitely in the mode of, “could’ve, would’ve, should’ve.” That is normal. How did I deal with it? I repented. I just said, “God, I am sorry. Forgive...