Azouz Buggy Baby & The Mikvah Project: Two Plays

1. Auflage 2018
ISBN: 978-1-78850-032-6
Verlag: Nick Hern Books
Format: EPUB
Kopierschutz: 6 - ePub Watermark

E-Book, Englisch, 128 Seiten

Reihe: NHB Modern Plays

Two plays showcasing the exciting and distinctive voice of Josh Azouz. Buggy Baby is a horror comedy about trying to build a normal life when nothing about life is normal. Jaden, Nur and baby Aya have escaped another country and ended up in a rotting room in London. While Nur is at college, Jaden chews leaves and has visions of giant rabbits with burning red eyes. He thinks Aya is someone else, someone dangerous. But she's just a baby. Isn't she? The Mikvah Project is a playful and poignant play about two men who meet every Friday in a north-west London Mikvah, a traditional Jewish pool used for ritual cleansing. Avi is married but childless. Eitan's voice is breaking and he's having wet dreams. At the Mikvah they talk about football, the synagogue choir, women. And as their bond deepens, a transformation begins... Both plays premiered at The Yard, London: Buggy Baby in 2018, directed by Ned Bennett, and The Mikvah Project in 2015, directed by the theatre's Artistic Director, Jay Miller.

Josh Azouz is a playwright, screenwriter and theatre director. His plays include: Gigi & Dar (Arcola Theatre, London, 2024); Once Upon a Time in Nazi Occupied Tunisia (Almeida Theatre, London, 2021) ;Victoria's Knickers (National Youth Theatre, 2018); Buggy Baby (Yard Theatre, London, 2018); and The Mikvah Project (Yard Theatre, 2015).

Autoren/Hrsg.

Azouz, Josh

Leseproben

One

The room has an addition. A baby.

BABY AYA is asleep in her buggy. She wears a helmet.

JADEN is sweeping the room.

NUR enters, aged eighteen. Takes off her shoes. Watches BABY AYA sleep.

NUR. Here. Got you something.

NUR throws a blue plastic bag to JADEN. He looks inside.

Beat.

JADEN. From where?

NUR. There’s an Ethiopian restaurant near college.

JADEN. I don’t like you hanging around those types of places.

NUR. It’s a restaurant, not a brothel.

JADEN. I didn’t know it was legal here.

NUR. It isn’t.

JADEN. Nur!

JADEN looks at the audience.

Some of them might be police.

NUR. Unlikely. This lot actually look like they’re down for a chew. Unless they’re after something stronger.

JADEN and NUR smile at the audience.

JADEN looks again in the blue bag.

JADEN. How did you know they had leaves?

NUR. I went in for a can of Sprite and the guy behind the counter kept talking. Talking so much I thought his jaw was going to drop off, or run away, but no the jaw stay fixed and he talked about the weather and that he’s been staring at the same road for time and it’s doing his brain and that his son swims every day and wants to go Olympics which I thought was original cos there can’t have been many Ethiopian Olympic swimmers.

JADEN inspects the leaves.

JADEN. They’re a different texture.

NUR. I’m sure they taste the same.

JADEN. How did you pay?

NUR. I appealed to the Ethiopian’s soul.

JADEN. Generous man to give you leaves for free.

NUR. Oh he didn’t. Told me to fuck off, so I had to borrow some money off a girl from the year below.

JADEN. Borrow? How much!?

NUR. Twelve pounds.

JADEN. Twelve pounds!? How will we pay her back!?

NUR. Relax, she’s a friend.

JADEN drops the bag.

Thought leaves would cheer you up.

JADEN. The leaves smell, they shouldn’t smell.

NUR. And give you energy, for a / job.

JADEN. If they’ve been tampered with they’ll make you do crazy things. I once tried to dance with a scorpion.

NUR. Can I have some then?

JADEN. Didn’t you hear what I just said!?

NUR. I like dancing.

JADEN. Well you can’t chew.

NUR. Why?

JADEN. I just don’t want you to.

NUR. Girls doing one thing, boys doing another?

JADEN. I didn’t mean it like / that.

NUR. You sound like a dinosaur. And we all know what happened to dinosaurs.

NUR approaches the bag.

JADEN. Chew now and you’ll never get for college.

NUR pauses.

How was college?

NUR. Quite amusing. In English we reworked a fairytale. I wrote one called Snow White and the Seven-Year-Old Dwarf.

JADEN. What did the teacher think?

NUR. She liked it cos it was inclusive.

JADEN looks at the bag.

You scared or something?

JADEN.…

Leaves distort time.

Make you see the whole world whilst remaining still.

NUR. Okay.

JADEN. Root you.

NUR. Root you?

JADEN. As if your feet are nailed to the floor.

NUR. Whoa.

JADEN. Why did you bring them into our home?

NUR. I just thought, you know, a gift.

A tense pause.

Twister?

NUR and JADEN play Twister.

JADEN walks away from the game.

NUR. We done then?

JADEN. Sometimes I’d chew with Yusrah.

NUR. Oh so Yusrah was allowed to chew.

JADEN. We were teenagers.

NUR. Before you were married!?

JADEN. Yeah.

NUR. Naughty.

Beat.

JADEN pops a leaf into his mouth.

Beat.

I thought it’s just like coffee.

JADEN. It is just like coffee.

NUR. I’ve been drinking coffee since I was ten.

Beat.

JADEN offers NUR the bag. She puts a leaf in her mouth.

They chew.

Not feeling anything.

JADEN. It takes a while.

JADEN stuffs more and more leaves into his mouth. NUR follows.

After a while they each have a bulging cheek.

JADEN looks at NUR chewing.

Your parents will be thrashing about.

NUR. They won’t be watching.

JADEN. How do you know?

NUR. They don’t have eyes.

JADEN. The dead don’t need eyes to see.

NUR. The dead don’t need eyes cos they’re dead.

JADEN. You an expert on the afterlife?

NUR. There is no afterlife.

JADEN. That must be depressing for you.

NUR. Whatever.

Time for English. I’ve been slack.

JADEN. That’s one way to ruin the chew.

NUR. Repeat after me. (With accent.) I’m hardworking, trustworthy, punctual.

JADEN (with stronger accent). I’m hardworking, trustworthy, punctual.

NUR. Excellent. (With accent.) It would be an honour to clean your toilet.

JADEN (with stronger accent). It would be an honour to clean – (No accent.) oh go away.

NUR (with accent). I’m okay with skidmarks.

JADEN. Stop!

NUR. You can’t keep doing Mustafa’s weeds for what he’s paying.

JADEN. Weeds!? Come and see the Eden I’m creating.

Orchids, geraniums, salvias. A rockery! Water feature! Compost!

NUR. Go for the job tomorrow.

Beat.

JADEN. I’ll try.

NUR smiles.

Spits out her leaves into her hand and puts them in the bin.

NUR. Very bitter.

JADEN. Drink something fizzy.

NUR opens the fridge. Drinks a can of something fizzy.

Pause.

NUR looks at the sleeping BABY AYA.

NUR. Was she smiley today?

JADEN. Like always. She’s a happy little girl.

NUR. Mm.

JADEN. Babies don’t need much.

NUR. No.

JADEN. Just attention.

NUR. She’s quite yellow.

Beat.

On the bus I think about her face. The cheeks I could eat. But when I get home I don’t… it’s like I don’t recognise her.

JADEN. You’ll be tired from college.

NUR (casual). I might be a barbarian.

JADEN. Eh!?

NUR. Just something I’ve been thinking.

Pause.

JADEN. Did I ever tell you about the time I had tea with the Queen?

NUR gives JADEN a look.

The Queen invites me to tea at Buckingham Palace.

NUR. Course she does.

JADEN. We eat cucumber sandwiches, scones, cakes. That long chocolate sausage with cream in the middle. We have a nice chat. About the weather mostly. And the Queen is the perfect host, the way she pushes food it’s like we’re family. I feel guilty for eating so much but then I try something called meringue and the guilt passes. After we finish, the Queen picks up a little bell. Rings it twice. Two servants enter the room. The first servant kneels down and holds a bucket. The second servant puts two fingers down the Queen’s throat.

She vomits up the entire tea. I scream! Everyone else goes quiet. The Queen slowly lifts her face from the bucket.

Looks me in the eyes. And burps.

NUR (mocking). Is it.

JADEN. True story.

NUR (chuckling). The fucking Queen.

NUR gives the audience a look.

JADEN stuffs more leaves into his mouth.

NUR and JADEN exchange charged looks.

Desire breaks down the doors.

Two

On the floor is the blue plastic bag with the leftover leaves.

BABY AYA is awake in her buggy, looking at us.

JADEN enters pushing an enormous box. He pushes it slowly across the room. We’re in Buster Keaton territory here. JADEN opens the box. Takes out an industrial heater. Plugs the industrial heater into the wall. An orange glow washes over the room.

The heater is very close to the bag.

BABY AYA smiles at JADEN.

JADEN begins to goof around.

A game emerges.

BABY AYA squeals in delight.

Mid-game, BABY AYA’s face becomes still and serious.

Then it goes very red.

She’s pushing out a poo.

BABY AYA finishes. She smiles at JADEN, pleased with herself.

Three

The room has a new addition. A giant tree.

The tree touches the ceiling. It is surrounded by lights and the industrial heater. The tree has an artificial colour.

NUR. WHEN THE LEAVES YOU BOUGHT GROW INTO A GIANT TREE, IT’S TIME TO MAKE SOME MOTHERFUCKING DECISIONS.

NUR and BABY AYA stare at each other.

NUR knocks on the wardrobe door.

JADEN steps out of the wardrobe.

Alright?

JADEN nods.

JADEN gets a can of tuna. Starts to prise it open with a rusty tin opener.

JADEN. Mustafa has a rabbit problem.

NUR. A rabbit problem.

JADEN. They’ve taken over. They’re digging up the flowerbeds.

NUR. Rabbits in Knightsbridge?

JADEN. Uh-huh.

NUR. Don’t the foxes eat them?

JADEN. Apparently not....